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Social Butterfly: Getting back into the game, 'Deis style

by Jenna Berger

Arts | 9/5/06
Posted online at 4:01 AM EST on 9/5/06

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As a Brandeis student, you probably ended last semester in one of three ways: swingin' single, about to plunge into a long-distance relationship (or maybe not-so-long-distance, but still holding down a relationship during the summer time) or, most commonly, not quite sure what you are-single, attached, dating-does it really matter? Can something as simple as a warm season away from the 'Deis affect your relationship meter? Most definitely.

In the first situation, you're freshly single, have just survived two weeks of grueling finals and are ready to welcome the beauties of summer with open arms. With a fresh bronze tan comes the confidence to date (or just hook up) for the summer. What happens at home, stays at home (or in Europe, or Cabo or wherever else), and summer is the perfect time for a temporary relationship.

Left frustrated and feeling they'd exhausted all possible dating prospects at Brandeis, many of my friends opted to pursue the summer fling and enjoyed every minute of it. If you're feeling unfulfilled by your summer trysts, however, try to begin this semester with a different mindset. That doesn't mean you should stop going out and pull a personality 180, but consider assessing your actions in different ways-a drunken hookup, for example, will almost never lead to a long-term relationship. Use your confidence and experience from the summer to narrow down what you're looking for, and pursue it. There's no better time than the first month of school, when everyone is still open to meeting new people. At this point, you have nothing to lose, so don't hesitate to start a conversation with that cutie you've been eyeing across the Boulevard everyday for the past week.

Pursuing a long-distance relationship is much rougher. Last semester, you might have basically lived with your significant other, and the walk from Ziv to North seemed the farthest you were ever apart. When summer began, the quick strolls across campus didn't seem like much of an issue-but staying emotionally close with hundreds of miles between you and your boyfriend or girlfriend isn't easy. Distance leads to distractions, and that's where things get tricky: summertime lends itself to less clothing, and one's eye can't help but wander occasionally. It doesn't mean you don't care for the person you've committed yourself to for three months; it just means that three months might be a bit longer than you thought.
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