Spring Break
MADE OF METAL: Nine Leaves dangerously lame
by Daniel D. Snyder
Associate Editor
Arts | 3/24/09
Posted online at 10:57 PM EST on 3/23/09
/ Last updated at 1:57 AM EST on 3/23/09
It dawned on me recently whilst sitting atop my golden throne that on the whole, I have been far too benevolent a ruler. In my time here I've dished out too many kind words, too much praise for my metallic idols. In other words, I found myself wondering if I'd gone soft, perhaps vanilla. There is a balance to maintain, after all, and there are those that must be made an example of. So, in the spirit of fairness and the cosmic equilibrium of good and evil, I grant you Made of Metal's first merciless sack beating (the burlap kind, not that kind) and execution by rusty, dull axe. Limbs will be served after the main event. But before we start the beating, perhaps you'd like to know a little bit about this poor soul and how they wandered into this land.
The musical "collective" known as Nine Leaves made several grave errors that led them to these gates. First, they named their new album Peace in Death. Reasonably metal, no? Second, they plastered on the front of this new album apocalyptic artwork strikingly reminiscent of the great metal cover artist Ed Repka. Third, they sent this deceptive package into the hands of an aspiring scribe of brutality eager to review his first press materials: me.
So, imagine my surprise when, upon looking to welcome this new subject into my kingdom, I discovered that Nine Leaves is in fact a social/eco-conscious hip-hop project, and a really lame one at that. Shocked, hurt and betrayed, I called out my minions to drag Nine Leaves away to the dungeon to await punishment. The executioner's blade grows hungry. The time is now.
Nine Leaves is the brainchild of Zack Hemsey, a composer, according to his own Web site, "known for awakening the emotions of his listeners" (the site is smothered in similarly stock, trite descriptions). Strike one for humility. The site also reveals his affinity for wearing brown and gray. Strike two for being blind. Peace in Death, the group's second album, is a kind of mish-mash of hip hop and obnoxious female warbling set over beats so weak they make Will Smith's albums sound downright dangerous.
Viewing Comments 1 - 9 of 11
Dot Com
posted 3/26/09 @ 9:30 AM EST
Mr. Hemsey's not gonna like this.
Frank
posted 3/28/09 @ 6:37 PM EST
my aunt died when the Care Bears blew up the bus she was on.
Chris
posted 4/10/09 @ 3:38 PM EST
Hey Daniel, here's a news flash for you - that album has nothing to do with "environmentalism" or being "militant"... It sounds like you got quite cranky when you saw the cover and expected to hear heavy metal. (Continued…)
Dot Com
posted 4/10/09 @ 6:40 PM EST
YO CHRIS
First of all, I know Mr. Snyder and he does like hip hop when the occasion calls for it. I happen to know he loves Earth Wind and Fire.
Second, I think it's hard to ignore the environmental overtones of the cover art and the label that Nine Leaves associates with. (Continued…)
Mike
posted 4/11/09 @ 7:45 PM EST
I actually like the album.... But chris makes a huge point.... Hip hop in the early 90's especially 92, was some of the best hip hop ever!!! So if it sounds like it's out of 92. (Continued…)
Ashley
posted 4/11/09 @ 7:58 PM EST
I took a listen myself. I don't think Dot Com is comparing it to the greats of the early 90's. I think he just means it sounds really outdated and amateur, which it does. (Continued…)
Mike
posted 4/12/09 @ 1:21 PM EST
Outdated to what? The garbage on the radio now? I think we need more bands like the nine leaves!! Aggression?? I'm guessing your satisfied with lil Wayne and jim jones. (Continued…)
Sarah
posted 5/17/09 @ 1:07 PM EST
Plus.
The chick in this group is an ugly skank.
Seriously. Shes a dumb bitch that looks like Jay Leno.
Kyle
posted 9/24/09 @ 12:48 AM EST
My homies told me I should check this Nine Leaves shiz out but I googed it and this re-view came up. this bitch writer is splittin' my sidz. i ain't goin nowhere near this record no more. (Continued…)
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